Mental Health

10 things affecting my wellbeing right now!

I’m back with an update that explains what has been affecting my wellbeing since July 2021 and contributing to my online absence.

Mental wellbeing

My mental wellbeing has suffered a lot since I last posted. I’ve had a lot of ups and downs mostly due to the stress of having to recruit Personal Assistants and contemplating moving out of my parent’s house for what will be the 3rd time. My wellbeing improved when I received my budget but the stress of moving creates its own anxieties and challenges.

I’m receiving help from my local mental health centre and attend sessions once a week. I also signed up for an online mental health platform called SpokzPeople. I wanted to write a post for mental health awareness day but was too overwhelmed to post anything. Mental health is important and not just one day a year. Wellbeing is becoming more prominently talked about since the Ukraine crisis. While that situation is terrible, poor mental health can be triggered and improved by small events too. Talk to someone if you are feeling low or struggling no matter what the reason.

Physical wellbeing

At the start of the first lockdown in 2020, I had so many plans for the upkeep of my wellbeing, so many tours and shows to watch online and accessible fitness classes for disabled people were being launched. Then I caught COVID-19 and it all went to hell.

One of the main things I realised after venturing outside again was how weak I was. It wasn’t all to do with being ill. I’d spent the best part of a year in a home where everything was adapted to my needs. This meant I wasn’t struggling to transfer. This was great at the time and a boast to my mental and physical health that most of my pain disappeared but without the daily struggle my body got lazy and I’m still not back to how I was.

In August 2020, I applied for and was given some resistance bands. The scheme run by Wheelpower is now open again. If successful they will post the bands to your home and their website has lots of videos with classes and ideas of how to use them.

Resistance-bands

I have now signed up for both the yoga and exercise classes starting next week. I’m hoping to get myself in shape. Wish me luck.

Dancing with Motionhouse

As I type this it’s our first performance this evening of Wondrous Stories on Thursday 17th March. If you’re in or near Birmingham we are performing in Centenary Square till Sunday 20th March as part of the Birmingham 2022 Festival. Our 8.30 pm performance is being live-streamed on Friday 18th for those who cannot make it in person. Dance and more importantly my teammates in Freewheelin’ Dance have an enormous, positive impact on my wellbeing.

Watch the Wondrous Stories from Friday 18th here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGTukQOMTkI

Wheelchairs and Wellbeing

Without my wheelchair, my wellbeing would suffer. My wheelchair is my legs and my independence, which is why I’m still searching for a suitable backup chair for when my Powerchair goes wrong. More on this when I have more time, with pictures I promise.

Recruiting PA’s for future wellbeing

Ever since I received my care package in June 2021. I’ve been trying to recruit people to assist me. I’m now having some success but writing and posting ads, conducting video interviews with the help of an advocate and then meeting people face to face has taken over my life. I’m hopeful I now have a good team and will write about my recruitment process in a future post.

Contingencies for my wellbeing

Contingencies, plans for what happens if my PAs are off work, are doing my head in at the moment. I’ve been looking at agency cover but the average cost of an agency in my area is £23 per hour and my council pays just under £16 agency rate. Next month my team will be on minimum wage pay as the council rate for Direct Payments hasn’t gone up for a least ten years. I know there are many people asking for a pay rate increase on the Direct Payment scheme across many different councils.

Journalism

I’m still studying for my certificate in journalism under the ADJ but due to the above, I haven’t managed to progress much. I’m really enjoying the course so far and thankful that the tutors and organisers are understanding when life gets in the way. I hope to complete this qualification before Christmas. Excuse me for mentioning that holiday before November!

Assistance Dog

I’ve always loved dogs. They make me smile from ear to ear! It’s always been a goal of mine to have a four-legged PA and thanks to Canine Partners it’ll happen. Canine Partners train assistance dogs for disabled people. The main tasks for me will be opening/closing doors, picking up anything I drop and assisting me with my coat. I’m hopeful this will mean I can leave the house independently. This will help my wellbeing massively both mentally and physically if I can do things on my own without asking for human help. If only dogs had opposable thumbs… 😂

Volunteering with Disability Horizons

I’m still part of the amazingly supportive Disability Horizons, I’ve just been doing less, mainly due to the time and energy recruitment was taking. I have several stories to edit and a few reviews planned so I hope you’ll keep your eyes peeled. Working with like-minded people gives me a boost and lessens the feeling that I’m struggling alone.

Disability Horizons

Collective voices create change and better wellbeing for all.

Lastly, I’m a member of several survey and disability groups that ask my opinion on different things. Disability Horizons has just started asking people to sign up to assist with market research. Another well-known company is Open Inclusion. There is also The Diversity Standards Collective which pays £10 per survey they send you. I’m not being paid to mention these and they may be others. These are just the companies I am part of and I find it interesting to share my views and hear of others’ experiences as well. The more disabled people provide feedback about products and services the more inclusive the world will be.

Happy New Lockdown

Happy New Lockdown! This was how my brother greeted me on his first day back at work after the Christmas Holidays and I found it so equally amusing and depressing that I just had to use it for this post. I hope everyone had the best Christmas they could and that New Year was a happy occasion for all my readers.

New years eve Fireworks
New Year’s Eve Fireworks

Recruitment

So new year same…activities! Literally! Last year I wrote about how I had lost a PA due to health problems and this year, thanks to COVID-19 I will be recruiting again. I have no idea what this will look like during lockdown but as my Mom helpfully pointed out, I have to find people to interview first! If I seem disillusioned and bitter about the process then, unfortunately, that’s an accurate picture. If any of you have any tips on how to make the recruiting process less stressful please let me know. I’m thinking of starting a support group for people who have lost carers/PA’s this year.

hands clasping
Hands clasping in support

My lockdown plan

On a more positive note, whilst I feel pretty negative about the recruitment process and Social Care in general, I’m determined that this year is the year that I get my ducks in a row! (Runaway Bride reference.) I’ve contacted The Disability Union, to assist me with getting my care package. I’ve signed up for the Lifebook Course to try and get a handle on how I want to actually live as all the assessments and stress has made it hard to see the wood for the trees. It may help or it may be new-age hype but I’m hoping for the latter. I’ll also be more active with Disability Horizons this year, writing and editing content. Check out my piece on free online courses available to stave off boredom and improve skills and knowledge during this latest lockdown.

I don’t know whether this new year equals a new me but I’m optimistic that it’s a year for change. What are your plans for this year? How are you feeling about the lockdown and the fact that there are now vaccines available?

I’d be interested to hear from you if you’ve had the COVID vaccine already. My disability whilst sometimes frustrating thankfully does not affect my health so I’m pretty far down on the list. A fact that I’m both incredibly grateful for and at the same time, I’m impatient for the world to be vaccinated so we can get back to whatever normal there is for us all. Who’s with me!?

Stuck In A Rut!

I’m stuck in a rut and have been struggling with what to write for nearly three weeks. In short, I’m having a self-esteem crisis and a bit of writer’s block. The ideas are there I just haven’t been able to do much with no mobility aids. I hate feeling useless and thankfully, with the return of my chair last week I’m beginning to climb out of the rut my mind has dug for itself. It has got me thinking though about the pressure that is put upon us to be productive. This post would’ve probably been more topical on World Mental Health Day but better late than never!

Being productive improves my mood

I’m the type of person that’s happiest when I have things to do and I feel useful and I think most people are the same. I’d love to know what you do when you’re stuck in a rut, bogged down by monotony, what helps you breakthrough and feel more like you?

Wheel out of that rut!

The first thing I did when I got my wheelchair back was head out for a short walk/wheel around the streets close to my house…I’ve just read that back, maybe around the neighbourhood sounds better? Anyway, it helped. Being able to be somewhere, by myself, helped and that’s what I’d been missing for three months, alone time.

I realise this post is a bit rambling but I just wanted to share my thoughts here. Writing is cathartic for me.

Rhys update

I have heard from Rhys Bowler but he’s been busy writing a speech for the Disability Cross-Party group of The Senedd, (Welsh Government.) The meeting was a week ago so I’m hoping to find out how it went soon. In the meantime, I have sent Rhys and his friend Sam my interview questions and Sam has very kindly shared her story with me. I’ll post it here next week, giving her a chance to see my write up first.

Blog post requests?

Please get in touch with what you would like to read from me. Any and all questions are welcome. I’d love to write a series about how I’m travelling the world but unfortunately, that’s just a pipe dream at the moment, as it is for many others in this COVID-19 environment.

Self-Isolation Activities

I’ve seen a few of these self-isolation posts pop up since I said I was going to post and while I’m not surprised by this, COVID-19 is after all the only topic of conversation at the moment. During my COVID-19 illness, I have to say audiobooks kept me sane as I didn’t have to focus on anything. I sincerely hope that non of my readers share my experience but being read to is a great way to pass the time, especially if you’re feeling under the weather or just fancy a lazy day. I hope you enjoy reading how I’m spending my isolation and I’d love to hear how you are filling your days during this crisis.

Colouring

I love colouring books and even before we officially isolated I used it as a way of gaining some me time. I’m unfortunately not arty and cannot draw to save my life. The beauty of colouring books is that the hard work is done for you.

Pigment app

I’ve recently discovered an app called Pigment which I now use on my iPad. It’s available for IOS and Android. You can finger tap, use a stylus to fill in an area or just set it so you can’t colour over the lines. Great if you have limited hand function. I find as much as I like pencils and paper, after 20 minutes my hands are really sore.

The app is free with in-app purchases which I recommend you leave alone. The app gives extra brushes or colours but is £7.99 per week! There are plenty of free pages without having to spend anything though. Pigment also lets you import pictures to colour in. There are other free colouring apps, Colorfy is a good example, (also available on Android) but this is my favourite. Check out a couple of my pictures below.

Organise Email

If you’re already a superbly organised individual then feel free to scroll down.

If you are looking for a way to be productive whilst in self-isolation then this is a good place to start. Having completed this task I can tell you it’s very satisfying.

Top tip:

It feels even less like work if you have music, the radio or your favourite audiobook on in the background.

The organisation process

My process for organising my account followed this pattern:

1) Open your email client or sign in using your web browser and click on your inbox

2) Have a piece of paper/your phone next to you before scrolling right to the bottom of your inbox.

3) Go through and read each message. Before moving to the next message decide if the email you are currently reading needs to be kept, filed away or left in your inbox. You have to take action before it can be moved.

If it’s an email from Amazon or similar, trying to persuade you to buy something you don’t want/need. Press the delete key! It can feel like a big accomplishment. If you’re like me, these kinds of emails have built up over the years! If however, it’s something you want to keep, think about a category folder that you could create for that email and write it down on your piece of paper. A few categories I use are Receipts, Social Services and Volunteering. Move onto the next email in your inbox when you have written a category down and leave the email in your inbox for the moment.

Screenshot Of Email Folders I've Created

4) Go through all your emails. You should now have deleted all useless ads etc. Your inbox will now contain emails that you need to take action with and emails that need to be filed. You will now also have a few categories jotted down.

Creating Folders

5) If you use an email client, I use Mail on a Mac, visit your email account via your web browser and create folders for all the categories that you noted down. I use Gmail. Folders are called labels in Gmail. To create a new folder you need to click on an email, find the label icon and type in a new label/folder name. After that click ‘create new.’ Do this for each of the categories you have written down.

Screenshot, How To Add Labels/Folders In Gmail

NB: Remember to untick the boxes unless you want to move the current email into your new folder.

6) Now you can go back to your inbox and go through it again. This time you can move each email into one of the categories you created. I had emails going back as far as 2016. It took me about two hours to do all of that. It did get boring but made life so much easier.

Organising my photos into folders in a similar way. I put all the photos from all my devices and memory cards onto my computer hard drive. I put my favourite music on in the background and went through them one by one.

Video Calling.

Video calls are a great way to stay in touch and can help keep feelings of isolation at bay. I haven’t done a lot of video calls as I find them exhausting at the moment. I really feel for people who haven’t got access to the internet at this present time. I’m mostly using Zoom, as I can have it running on my Mac and everyone can access it. Unlike Facetime, where an Apple device is needed. I’ve just started taking part in two regular quizzes via zoom which is entertaining. Fingers crossed I’ll feel well enough this Friday to take part in my Freewheelin’ dance class again. After over a month’s absence, I’m missing it.

Screenshot zoom Dance

Audiobooks

I use two audiobook services, Audible and RBDigital.

Audible is relatively well known and is owned by Amazon. I love the choice and control you have with this service. For £7.99 a month you get one credit on a recurring monthly subscription unless paused or cancelled. Find a book you like and listen to a sample. This is particularly useful if like me you find some narrators more enjoyable than others. Purchase the book with either a credit or by paying by credit card. Within twelve months you can exchange a book for another if you don’t like your choice.

When you first join you have access to a months trial which means you get your first book free. At the moment, I’m listening to Wicked by Gregory Maguire. The book is very different from the theatre production. 😉

Screenshot Of The Audible App On My Phone

Top Tip

When signing up for the free trial, choose the two book a month option. You will get two free books. If you love the service but £14.99 is too expensive, you can always downgrade to the one book a month subscription before the trial ends. If you cancel before the trial is up, won’t be charged and you’ll get to keep your books. Pausing membership is where you take a break for three months. You are still a member. Membership and billing restart after three months but for the paused period you are not charged and no more credits are added to your account. This is Great for when you have too many books to listen to.

RBDigital is the service Birmingham Libraries uses for it’s members to access audiobooks/magazines and now apparently also newspapers. In my experience it’s a lot more limited than Audible but it is a free service. A valid library card is required and set up is done through your main library webpage. Your city may not use this service, some use Overdrive. Below is a screenshot of Birmingham Libraries page explaining set up and the RBDigital app on my phone.

Screenshot of RBDigital app, displaying A Harry Potter Book

Ebooks

Reading is a solitary activity that takes me to different places and is the only way we can travel at the moment. Ever since I’ve owned E-Readers I’ve loved ebooks. They are so much easier to hold and I can read whilst I sit outside, great when the weather is nice and sunny.

Libby App

I use a Kindle Oasis and an app called Libby. Libby is the ebook app for my library and can be downloaded onto all android, and IOS tablets. Like the RBDigital app, listed above, a valid library card is required but set up can be done through the app itself. The app will ask you to select your local library and input your library card number. If you have an E-Reader that uses the Epub format rather than the Kindle/Mobi one, loans from Libby can be sent to your e-reader. The only drawback to my kindle is library books can’t be added to it.

I use Amazon to get most of my books, which is why I prefer the Kindle above other e-readers. Kindle Unlimited is currently offering a free trial to new customers. Project Gutenberg offers free out of copyright books to the public. I’ve also just discovered a website called Manybooks.net, which I’ll be exploring for new books soon.

Kindle

Writing

Last but definitely not least is writing. It helps me relax and get any and all ideas out of my head before I go to sleep at night. At least that’s the theory, it doesn’t quite work that well in practice. While I was ill I couldn’t write at all which is why this post has taken so long. I still find looking at my laptop screen tiring. I couldn’t wait to start writing again! I’m pleased to be getting back to some semblance of normality in these strange times.

Top tips for coping with isolation

Not being able to see friends and family is hard and it is very easy to let the situation affect your mental health. Many disabled people already know what isolation feels like as illness or circumstances have meant that they can’t go out.

Whether you are isolating because you are ill, shielding or just following lockdown rules here are my top tips for staying sane.

Pick activities that isolation rules don’t change

With the exception of reading, all of the activities I have listed are activities that are done by me when I’m alone. Ok if I wasn’t isolating I may colour in the same room as others or listen to music and books with headphones on but I don’t actually need and wouldn’t normally have anyone else engaging with me. This reduces the sense of weirdness that self-isolation can bring. I’m doing something by myself and I’m enjoying it. Focusing on this instead of the fact that I can’t visit friends is a positive frame of mind that will assist your mental well-being.

Reading can take you from isolation to anywhere in the world

Whatever form it takes for you, ebooks, physical books, audiobooks, can transport your mind away from your isolation to different countries, fantasy lanes or just make you think of something else. Using your imagination in this way is one of the best ways I have found to combat loneliness.

Keep in touch with friends and family

It doesn’t matter how you do it keep in touch. Phone calls, video calls, emails, letters postcards. Have contact with people. If you’re looking to meet people there are now various groups online to suit all sorts of interests. Dance, writing, knitting, crafting, photography are just a few ideas.

I hope you’ve enjoyed reading about how I’m spending my isolation. Get in touch and let me know what you’ve been doing to keep busy. If anyone has any podcast recommendations please let me know as I’m interested to know what all the hype is about but unsure where to start as there is so much choice!

Till next time stay safe and well.

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